The change

The feelings you once

Held so deep

Start to wane

At times you weep

You think of how

She said she don't

And how you replied

That you never won't

Leave or stop

The way you feel

But something is happening

So what's the deal

You don't control

What's in your heart

You can't force love

You can't make her start

The years and years 

You held your tongue

And took each word

She had ever brung

Into your mind

Into your soul

Making you feel

Out of control

Less of a man

More of a punk

Until suddenly you're in

This unusual funk

It has no form

It has no groove

It has no way 

For you to prove

That it comes from her 

Or what you had

it is just this feeling

And it feels so bad

But bad in a way

That doesn't hurt

Not bad in a way

You're down in the dirt

It's bad because

All these years

All those heartaches

And all those tears

Are fading out

And nothing more

A faint horizon

On a distant shore

You begin to notice

You care much less

And you don't put up

With all the mess

Your heart is changing

The love you felt

Is becoming less

And starting to melt

You recognize

It all as true

And you can't stop it

With anything that you do

You think back on

The times you swore

You'd never leave

Or walk out that door

You were not that guy

You were not that type

You may complain

You might even gripe

But leave the home

Or end the vow

That was not you

No way no how

But over and over

Even now today

She sees you as less

With all she'd say

You are the reason

Things are so uncool

Why a certain boy

Keeps playing the fool

Why she has vices

The others now see

It's because you did it

And the culprit is me

I'm why this thing 

Would never work

I'm always selfish

And quite a jerk

I hide behind 

Big words and phrases

Winning people

Over in phases

First they see

Just what I do

I pay the rent

Wait, I'm not through

I pay the phone

I pay the car

I pay the price

I play the star

I'm the good guy

The one they see

That does the best

Saying look at me

Well now you feel

As though things change

And the emotions inside

Now rearrange

You know this talk

Of why you're out

Why it's over

What it's about

Is based in your need

To have all these friends

A lot of them girls

And the flirts that you send

But you say wait a minute

It goes deeper than this

There are so many points

Everyone seems to miss

The reasons I do 

The things that she hates

And why I just don't

Go out on any dates

It's because I was hurt

So long ago

And told to forget it

She did it and so

That was so long ago

Years when we give thought

But you just can't forget 

The day they were caught

Nobody remembers 

They always forget

The pain and the suffering

The betrayal you met

The words spoken daily

They cut like a knife 

And all of them came

From the one called your wife

Eventually it wears

It tears at your heart

It doesn't matter what year 

Or when it did start

It changes your psyche'

It changes your look

It changes your heart 

Because of the beating it took

Now today it's too late

To explain all the crap

And where it began

There is no such map

But today we can see

And we even can feel

That what there once was

Has no more appeal

I can't help it, I tried

I really held out

But I can't find it inside

And I'm starting to doubt

I will ever recover

This woman I loved

Who destroyed how I cared

She pushed and she shoved

It all out the door

Of our proverbial life

And I not only lost the love

I indeed lost my wife

I could end this poem

I could move on and live

But I can't seem to forget

Although I have to forgive

Tomorrow will come 

Who knows what awaits

I must be open to change

And accept both of our fates

Time so Brief for sons

Just woke up

Ever so brief

To let you know

Time is a thief

It takes your days 

It makes you run

It steals the time

You spend with your sons

Give them love

Give them smiles

Let them know

That all the while

You're there for them

All else is fluff

The time you spend 

Is never enough 

Because they grow up 

Way too fast

And the time you share 

Can never last

Long enough

For you to say

I have no more 

Time today

So be there whenever 

You know you could

Each day each moment

Because you should

They're all you have 

You're own to love

A gift from God 

Sent from above

So I reach over now

And feel him sleep

My wayward son

My love he'll keep

I'm always here 

I'll always be

The dad you need

The dad that's me

I love you son....

Humility over humiliation

What is life

But a one shot deal

To grow in spirit 

By being real

Real as in humble

Not full of pride

Or living a lie

Or trying to hide

The faults and flaws

The wrongs you do

Because only truth

Will get you through

To the other side 

The one of spirit

So speak what's real

So the world can hear it

Don't be fake

Or make a show

Of all you want 

Others to know

That ain't the real 

And honest way

To say what you do

And do what you say

I'm not calling out

All of the liars

But if you are a fake

You best tend to your fires

Because bridges they burn

And you can't go back

If integrity is gone

And character you lack

Think on how 

You want it to end

Can you forgive all you've done

Will the fences soon mend? 

It's not about you

Or all that you've got

It's what you let go 

Did you do it or not? 

Did you hold on to anger

Did you make love to hate

Or did you find your real purpose

It's never too late

To leave the person 

Inside that brings down

All of your dreams 

Makes you look like a clown

Be love and be strong

Be good and be right

Follow the spirit

Within day and night 

Others will notice 

And respect who you are 

Some will dispise you 

And talk from afar

But worry about nothing

Except your own heart

Can you live with yourself

Well at least that's a start 

To be a dad.....

TO BE A DAD IS TO THANK A KID

There are certain things

Like being a dad

That make you realize

What you had 

Were days and years

With an old soul

That came to you 

With one clear goal

To help you grow

Unknown but true

As you provided

With all you do

Work the job

Pay each bill

Be responsible

And you do that still

You aren't so perfect

But a dad will try

To do what's right 

Under the child's watchful eye

No longer for you

Do you live your life

You have a baby

Made with your wife

Perhaps you fought

And argued some

But they saw you forgive

And just whistle and hum

Finding the positive 

In what might be cursed

Taking the best

From all of the worst

Knowing your flaws

Revealed by the child 

Keeping you humble

Calming what's wild

You think that the baby

Is something you teach

But the soul it has 

Is trying to reach

The one within you

The one crying out

For a sense of direction

A clear way out

Of this life in a haze

This life with no clue

This question of why

And what can I do? 

The baby brings purpose

The child brings a need 

To somehow take charge 

To get in the lead

To be bigger than who

You were yesterday

To give the example

To show the right way

So think hard about it

This day for the dad

If a child calls you father

A girl or a lad

They are here not just 

To withdraw from your banks

They help you grow up

For that give them thanks

So I say

Happy kids day

You have changed me 

In so many ways

And you aren't done yet. 

I love you both Jordan Paul Sumner and Ryan Hargrove Sumner.