Friday, April 20, 2012

Get a life.......a post on my view of true friendship

Being a some what above average participant on the social media site "Face Book" has enabled me to be "connected". I say connected because not only have I reconnected with presumed long lost friends and acquaintances, but I have also managed to meet new, previously unfamiliar individuals, who in turn became my "friend" on the popular web page.
Now, my tally is much, much lower than those who came in with established popularity and notoriety, but it is also much larger than those who rarely use the site or limit themselves to people they have known in the "real world".
But let me say this about that. Although I fully understand the benefits of real, face to face interaction, I also understand in many circumstances, particularly on "Face Book", that level of communication is not only impractical, but also impossible. So, with that being said I have determined to make my friends where I find them. They too live in the "real world" because they exist. They are not some fabrication within my own delusional mind. Instead, they are actual people with actual feelings, interests, and opinions, just like you and I.
I have often heard the worn out cliche' "Get a life", and I perceive it as an attack on my character the majority of the time it is directed at myself. It is almost as if they see me as someone who is inactive or shut off from the world around me. There could be no assumption made about me that is more inaccurate. I have concluded that those who direct that statement to me do not have enough understanding of who I really am to say such a thing. That in itself is not a bad thing but it does define them as coming from a place of ignorance when it comes to labeling me.
Soren Kierkegaard once said "Once you label me, you negate me.". To me, it says I am much, much more than a Face Book profile. I am a father, a son, a husband, a brother, an uncle, a nephew, a cousin, a college graduate, a Sunday school teacher, an occasional writer, poet, and blogger, an intermittently successful comedian, philosopher, pundit, and counselor, I am a long time surveyor and mapper, I am a veteran, a long suffering Minnesota Viking fan, an avid history buff with emphasis on the American Civil War, and with great pride and honor I call myself a friend to those who claim me as such. This list is by no means exhaustive and I feel I will never be done adding to it. That is exactly why I see myself as an individual who does indeed have "a life". I am flawed, but who among us is not? Many of the flaws I am aware of and some are difficult to remove from my character because the flesh is weak and desires what is contrary to the Spirit. But I believe my God is a patient and forgiving God because God loves me and when I read his word he clearly defines love as being patient and forgiving.
As I type this out I am hit with the reality of this day and it being the 47th anniversary of my arrival into this world. I will say with all sincerity that my experiences have been enough to fill the resume' of any octogenarian trying to get past Saint Pete, and I am not done yet (unless God calls me home for an unexpected interview).
At this age I have transcended the gimme gimme stages of youth and greed that told me my birthday was some kind of mini Christmas where I could justifiably demonstrate my grasp of narcissism. Today, I actually treasure the cards and what they really say. I actually associate a birthday wish given from a friend as something better than a tangible gift. I see it as a person who has a "life" actually taking time out of their day to stop and recognize me with appreciation that I am a part of theirs. Looking at it from that point of view causes me to be extraordinarily grateful for every true friend that I have. Believe me, and I am sure if you have some years behind you, TRUE friends are more valuable and rare than the finest gold and gold is not having a rough time of it lately in the market place.
True friendship is an investment of time on the part of both individuals and it must be valued if it is to endure. I want all who actually value me to know I do not take the honor and privilege lightly and that in turn, you too are valued by me as that rare thing we so often take for granted. Real.

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